Dear Bun Bun (Japanese for buzz, buzz),
This picture accurately represents how my brain feels the twelfth time through your songs.
Now, the other problems. Your songs are not even English. My smattering of Japanese is not usually enough to decipher what you are actually singing and this means not only that I could be singing almost anything. It also means that I spend all of my driving hours listening to a CD that I don’t even understand. This fact remains despite the fact that I have listened to you for SO MANY HOURS that I can repeat every sound you make on cue. If you picked me up and dropped me in the middle of “Shabondama” (Soap Bubbles), I would immediately start singing and no one would be able to stop me. (Nor would they know what I’m saying.)
Second of all, you only have twelve songs and each of them is approximately 2 minutes or less. Which means that you repeat EVERY 18 MINUTES. I hear everything you have to offer in a one-way trip to the grocery store. Furthermore, usually this 2 minutes encompasses you singing the same song twice in a row. So it’s not even that I hear different verses!
For the first 6 months we played you, you were new and exotic. We were learning new things! We were keeping up with our Japanese! We were remembering our travels! I was enlarging my boys’ IQ because they were hearing a foreign language!
For the next 6 months, I hated you and wanted to run into a light post because it would MAKE YOU STOP SINGING. And now we have reached another stage, and this is the one that worries me the most: the stage where it actually doesn’t bother me anymore. I listen to you so much that you have actually become the soundtrack to my driving life. I step in a car, any car, and automatically I start humming “Kira, kira, hikaru” (Twinkle, twinkle, little star) because that is what my brain thinks needs to happen if I am going to drive.
I know we have a complicated relationship, and I’m sorry that at one point in our relationship I contemplated scratching you beyond recognition. But if you can’t forgive that, at least realize that now I have to keep you safe, because you getting damaged would be the start of World War III. I know this because I have tried to make a CD switch. Oh, how I have tried. I have talked up other CDs, I have promised new and exciting songs, but Lincoln will not accept anything other than you.
Heaven help us all, you are beyond safe.
-Me
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